When for the december template
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- Kat05
- Preeminent Rocketeer
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Empowermom wrote:
This just in.... Santa was last seen sailing across the skies of Kentucky when Rudolph's nose blew a fuse. Santa set down at a local diner to call Mrs. Claus and request a special delivery for a new bulb for Rudolph's nose. She used UPS ground instead of FedEx but alas, it was the last bulb of the season. Mrs. Claus didn't use the proper shipping label so UPS can't track the package.AWESOME!
Meanwhile, Santa was bombarded with brownies by the owner of the diner, who was trying to console the not-so-jolly man. Soon after, the owner realized he'd given Santa the wrong batch, which was meant for his weekly football party. They all settled in to watch the game.
In the holiday spirit, and hearing there was a top secret, specially sealed package on the sleigh marked "Gantry," an emmisary from FedEx volunteered to personally deliver the package, but Santa appears to have forgotten where he put the special key to unlock it.
Santa appears to be in better spirits about the whole thing, bellowing "Ho, Ho, Ho!" non-stop but the locals aren't convinced he's sober. He's eating up all the diner's profits and and they had to send out for more sodas. They fear he won't fit in the sleigh when the bulb arrives.
There is a reward for anyone who can locate the one of a kind key marked "Gantry - TOP SECRET." Anyone with information on the whereabouts of this key is requested to call 1-800-ROCKET.
Stay tuned for more updates here at RocketTheme Central.
- Kat05 / QA Lead & Support / Germany
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- Empowermom
- Hero Rocketeer
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Gantry Update:
As reported earlier, there is a nationwide hunt for the one of a kind Gantry key. It is unclear if the key is located in Alaska or if Santa lost it somewhere over the Appalachians last night just before Rudolph's light went out. No one was hurt during the emergency landing.
The CIA fears one of Santa's top security elves may be harboring the Gantry key to use in negotiations as rumblings of elf strikes loom just as the Christmas season begins. The investigation is ongoing and authorities won't release the name of the elf in question, but secret sources say he has been called a "misfit" in the past. It is also believed that the failure of Rudolph's nose was not an isolated instance but was sabotage. Authorities are holding Rudolph in an unknown location for further questioning and protection as he is considered a national treasure.
The RBI (Rocket Bureau of Investigation) and the RIA (Rocket Intelligence Agency) issued a statement this morning. The nation's top bomb expert and negotiations strategist, Andy Miller, stated in an early morning press conference, "My best team is on it! We are confident we will be able to decode the lock, but patience is necessary. We must be careful not to disturb what is believed to be a highly contagious virus placed in the lock by an unnamed elf. It is also believed a dirty bomb was placed in the lock which will destroy the only copy of Gantry if the lock is not decoded properly. People around the world would be disappointed if such an event were to occur. The safety of my team and the best interests of the public are at the forefront of our endeavors. We expect resolution to the problem in just a few hours."
In related news, Santa is reportedly despondent over his unintentional ingestion of a mind altering substance, however no charges are being filed against the owner of the diner where he stopped for repairs. The owner, whose name is being withheld, stated this was a result of a prank by his step-son, known by locals as "BigFoot," who has disappeared into the Appalachian mountains.
Santa, when asked about his plans for backup should the last known bulb for Rudolph's nose not be recovered, replied, "Though many have tried and failed, even the Grinch can't stop Christmas. Gantry will be delivered on time to all the nice boys and girls on my list."
Outside, thousands of volunteers have amassed upon this small Appalachian town. A mass, world-wide delivery service has been organized and packages are already on their way to their appointed destinations by unconventional methods.
More updates coming soon exclusively at RocketCentral.
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- Empowermom
- Hero Rocketeer
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I've decided to take the morning off until we get the new template. I have two sites sitting ready to launch but I refuse to put another lick of work in on the design until the "unveiling."
It's quite possible, however, that I've consumed WAY too much caffeine since the wee hours of the morning. LOL!
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- Empowermom
- Hero Rocketeer
- Posts: 476
- Thanks: 32
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LIVE UPDATE! BREAKING NEWS!
An emergency meeting was held early this morning between President Obama and Santa, who was flown in by Air Force One from Kentucky early this morning. President Obama has declared a state of global emergency and is calling upon people around the world to unite in solving what has now been labeled "ChristmasGate." He stated, "Christmas is an unalienable right for all and we will not negotiate with Christmas terrorists. They will all be brought to justice."
“We must work quickly in a bipartisan fashion to resolve this crisis and to avert a worldwide Christmas catastrophe,” Obama said at an emergency press conference. “Washington must recognize that we must act, not just to address the crisis at the North Pole apparently instigated by greedy elves, but also a crisis around Christmas trees and stockings across the globe.”
Obama took measures to pass an emergency 210.8 billion Christmas bailout package, saying the “world must be assured that this action reflects the basic principles of a global holiday spirit, peace on earth and good will towards men. America stands ready with assistance if needed.”
Details on the package are being released later today and a vote is expected at high noon tomorrow if the crisis has not been resolved.
Andy Miller, Chief RIA officer, is still investigating the situation and a bomb squad is attempting to open the Gantry package safely. The agency is not commenting on their efforts at this time.
Stay tuned for hourly updates live at RocketCentral
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- The Wingman
- Elite Rocketeer
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It's a trap & diversion I tell you! Your chasing the wrong lead!
Nobody listens to me, but that darn Frosty the Snowman is behind it I tell you! Him and that little furry rodent the Easter Bunny! :shock: They still are jealous over Santa's fame! - "You can learn a lot from a dummy. So, pay attention to yourself." Quote by me.
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- Rich Bean
- Elite Rocketeer
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Obama took measures to pass an emergency 210.8 billion Christmas bailout package, saying the “world must be assured that this action reflects the basic principles of a global holiday spirit, peace on earth and good will towards men. America stands ready with assistance if needed.”
You forgot to add "unprecedented" in there somewhere!!! - My Sites:
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I'm a Henning Stalker!
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- The Wingman
- Elite Rocketeer
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RICHARD BEAN wrote:
Obama took measures to pass an emergency 210.8 billion Christmas bailout package, saying the “world must be assured that this action reflects the basic principles of a global holiday spirit, peace on earth and good will towards men. America stands ready with assistance if needed.”
You forgot to add "unprecedented" in there somewhere!!!
The only thing "unprecedented" about Obama is his head and the Delusions of Grander he suffers from! - "You can learn a lot from a dummy. So, pay attention to yourself." Quote by me.
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- Rich Bean
- Elite Rocketeer
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Now now...let's not get carried away Wingman...
It's spelt Grandeur
Edit: If we upset the French we'll have to go apologise (UK Spelling) again! - My Sites:
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I'm a Henning Stalker!
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- Cubfan
- Sr. Rocketeer
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The Wingman wrote:
The only thing "unprecedented" about Obama is his head and the Delusions of Grander he suffers from!
Delusions of grandeur? He's the freaking president, dude. I don't think that's a delusion.
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