Why Rocket Theme
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- Dave Goodwin
- Elite Rocketeer
- Posts: 1472
- Thanks: 4
- Howdy!!
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Andy Miller wrote:
LOL.. you guys are too much! I really should think about getting Dave to write my promotional material
IF ROCKETTHEME WERE A CAR LOT:
Come in today to
(with booming voice and reverb) ROCKETTHEME!
and pick up your brand new 2007 template.
HURRY!
While our inventory lasts and the hot financing is still available!
RIGHT NOW!
For a limited time you can take delivery on your 2007 RocketTheme Template with lots of extras
EXTRAS!
Like, rotating headers, clean pure CSS/tableless design, modern and sophisticated color variations, easily customizable, lightweight and fast-loading and
BIG!!!
12 fully collapsible module positions for the most flexible layout options possible!
TODAY ONLY!
At the coolest place on the world wide web!
ROCKETTHEME!!!
That's RocketTheme.com
ANDY (on camera with purple pimp hat): "Tell 'em Andy sent ya, mate!"
(VoiceOver) Blast Off!!
Announcer Disclaimer: RocketTheme is in no way responsible for a computer that crashes, burns and otherwise stop working as a result of using an RT template.
ROCKETTHEME!!!
(SFX of rocket launch)
;D - Last Edit: 18 years 1 month ago by Dave Goodwin.
- "I'm an individual, just like everyone else."
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- Dave Goodwin
- Elite Rocketeer
- Posts: 1472
- Thanks: 4
- Howdy!!
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Delete this if it's too large. It's in screenplay format.
INT. ROCKET SHIP -- DAY
Andy, the rocket ship pilot checks his watch.
ANDY
We have only ten minutes until
midnight.
KEVIN
(with Scottish accent)
But Cap'n! We've got to get that
shipment of templates to the people
down below! They're shaking apart,
Cap'n! They can't take much more of
this, Cap'n!
ANDY
Yes, you are correct, Kevin, but the
hackers have disrupted the server
and effected delivery!
KEVIN
Aye, Cap'n, but they will mutiny if
we can't deliverer!
Kevin looks anxiously.
Andy rubs his chin, sweat pours from his forehead.
EXT. PLANET SURFACE -- DAY
An angry and trembling crowd gathers.
CHRIS
What'll we do, Dave? What'll we do?
What if Andy and Kevin are late?
Huh? What about that? Huh?
MATTHEW
They won't be late!
JAMES S
Grow up, man! You acting like your
16!
DAVE
Leave him alone!
Dave's authoritative voice reverberates through the canyon.
DAVE (CONT'D)
They've not let us down yet!
Dave wipes the sweat from his brow as another shiver surges
through his body.
2.
DAN L
Good grief, Dave, those shakes are
getting worse! Let me build a
template for you...
DAVE
(interrupting)
No! I'll be fine. We only have a
few minutes. I have every confidence
in Andy and Kevin.
Someone runs up to the group.
THOMAS NEILSEN
The members are getting restless.
There's talk of a mutiny!
Dave whips around.
DAVE
Mutiny?
THOMAS NEILSEN
They're threatening to download their
templates from that cheap knock-off
site that stole Andy's work!
DAN L
But, I can build them a template
that will hold them over, if I can
just...
DAVE
Wait!! They will be here.
CHRIS
But what if they're not? Huh? What
if they took all the membership money
and flew the coup and left us with
no support?
VOICES FROM THE CROWD
Mutiny!
INT. ROCKET SHIP -- DAY
Andy and Kevin aboard the rocket ship.
KEVIN
Cap'n! The templates are too heavy.
We need to dump some code - and module
position User 2 is refusing to
collapse! THE TEMPLATE IS BREAKING
APART, CAP'N!
ANDY
My God, man!
(MORE)
3.
ANDY (CONT'D)
Pull yourself together and expedite
the repairs. We have cloud cover
down below. It's going to be a hell
of a ride.
EXT. ROCKET SHIP -- DAY
The RT rocket ship begins to enter the atmosphere.
Heat and flames surround the rocket!
It shakes.
Suddenly a long distance shortwave signal is heard on the two-way radio.
VOICE ON RADIO
Can you folks hear me? My batteries are running low!
KEVIN
Andy, It's GollumX! He's checking in from Fuji!
GOLLUMX
Andy, have you released that template yet? Please, you have to hurry!
Those guys from India are eating my lunch!!
EXT. PLANET SURFACE -- DAY
The crowd hears an explosion.
They look upward (and onward).
MIKE VANKIRK
Look! They're breaking the sound
barrier! Hey! Stop scaring my parrots!!
Another more terrible shiver courses through Dave's body.
Two RT members notice Dave shaking badly.
YOUYOU
I think that if Dave's menu system
were coded correctly he'd...
DAMO
Leave him alone. There's nothing
that can be done. It will take a
new template release to settle the
situation for him - and all of us,
God help our souls!
INT. ROCKET SHIP -- DAY
ANDY
Look! Who's that down there? I
can't make the image out. He's very
dark.
KEVIN
I can just make him out - the beard,
the longish hair - yes, that's Roland!
ANDY
Ah! He's lightened up his image.
Good!
(to Kevin)
Get ready to land! We'll make that
deadline if it kills us!
4.
EXT. PLANET SURFACE -- DAY
The RT rocket ship shakes wildly.
Dave shakes wildly.
The RT rocket ship settles down.
Dave settles down.
The RT rocket ship begins to shake wildly again.
Dave shakes wildly too.
DAVID YORK
Quick! Dave needs a chair! What
should I get?
MATTHEW
A Herman Miller Aeron! That's the
only chair that will hold together
while Dave gyrates like that.
PETER OSIPOF
I agree! That's a comfortable chair,
but it's too pricy!!
YVES
But Andy has two of them at home! I
hope he brings one!
ROLAND
Hic! Does Andy have any Miller beer?
DAVID YORK
My God, man! Dave's shaking worse
than Rush Limbaugh imitating a popular
TV actor, and all you can think of
is beer?
ROBERT WAGERS
If Andy doesn't get here soon I'll
strap Dave into MY chair!!
INT. ROCKET SHIP -- DAY
KEVIN
Oh my gosh!! We are just moments
from landing and the Forge has just
gone down! We can't deliver, Cap'n!!
ANDY
The ship is on autopilot. I'll have
to take a look at the Forge. I'll
be a little while. Take over, Kevin.
KEVIN
WHAT WILL WE DO???
5.
ANNOUNCER: Will Andy fix the Forge and deliver the template?
Will the gang find a suitable chair for Dave to shake in
comfort? More importantly, will Roland get any of Andy's beer?
Stay tuned for the further adventures of ANDY TO THE RESCUE!
A RocketTheme.com Template Extraordinare Production!
DAVE
RT MEMBERS, PREPARE FOR TEMPLATE GLORY! - Last Edit: 18 years 1 month ago by Dave Goodwin.
- "I'm an individual, just like everyone else."
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- Mike VanKirk
- Preeminent Rocketeer
- Posts: 15294
- Thanks: 3
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LMAO.....
That was a good read DaVe.
Mike - Last Edit: 18 years 1 month ago by Mike VanKirk.
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- Dave Goodwin
- Elite Rocketeer
- Posts: 1472
- Thanks: 4
- Howdy!!
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Thanks, Mike. That perhaps the longest post yet on the RT forums - if it's not deleted first.
dave
Yippee! I'm at 1,000! I think I'll celebrate and see 300 this weekend!
P.S. - If you didn't get written into ANDY TO THE RESCUE, you could be in the next episode - watch out!! ;D - Last Edit: 18 years 1 month ago by Dave Goodwin.
- "I'm an individual, just like everyone else."
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- GollumX
- Elite Rocketeer
- Posts: 2817
- Thanks: 0
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LMAO
You got skills Dave!!
Great stuff. - Say no to Internet Explorer 6.
twitter.com/mark_up
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- Dave Goodwin
- Elite Rocketeer
- Posts: 1472
- Thanks: 4
- Howdy!!
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GollumX wrote:
LMAO
You got skills Dave!!
Great stuff.
Oh man!! I forgot GollumX, way down in Fuji!! Read again in 15 minutes and I'll write you into the script!! It's 24 minutes after the hour now!
UPDATE: Finished (33 after)
dave - Last Edit: 18 years 1 month ago by Dave Goodwin.
- "I'm an individual, just like everyone else."
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- Mike VanKirk
- Preeminent Rocketeer
- Posts: 15294
- Thanks: 3
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GollumX, where have you been?
Enjoying the sunshine in Fiji?
You lucky dog!
Mike
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- Joe Halleck
- Preeminent Rocketeer
- Posts: 5481
- Thanks: 68
- Never give up!
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No templates were harmed or deleted during the writing of this screenplay.
Does the RT Rocket trip bring you up to see the great HAL 9000 computer?
Lets see what he has to say?
Hello Hal9000 - Magento - phpBB3 - Kunena - RokBridge Specialist
No Secure Tab posts unless requested.
Use the Thank You and Life Preserver Buttons!
Your signature is also great place for setup details...help us help you!
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- Dave Goodwin
- Elite Rocketeer
- Posts: 1472
- Thanks: 4
- Howdy!!
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Joseph Halleck wrote:
No templates were harmed or deleted during the writing of this screenplay.
Does the RT Rocket trip bring you up to see the great HAL 9000 computer?
Lets see what he has to say?
Hello Hal9000
Dang! I forgot another key player! Sorry Joseph. I catch you in the next episode! BTW, you can join me for a beer in the Pro Lounge!
dave
UPDATE: Joseph, I read that HAL 9000 link - and read and read and read! It was a hoot! Made want to buy that web server some meds. Poor thing! Thanks! I'll send that one out!! You da man! - Last Edit: 18 years 1 month ago by Dave Goodwin.
- "I'm an individual, just like everyone else."
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- James Spencer
- Preeminent Rocketeer
- Posts: 46340
- Thanks: 50
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LMAO! That is great Dave. This story was the funniest thing ive read on rocket theme. I hope to see more in maybe the "Rocket Weekly" ;D
I was included as well ;D YEAH! - James Spencer / Developer & Support / Hull, UK
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